Why the "Heartbeat Away From the Presidency" Argument Doesn't Work Against Palin

So I'm excited about Palin as VP. In fact, I think the whole announcement (who it was, and the timing) was probably the smartest move this year out of either campaign. But the Dems have started panicking. And what arguments they're resorting to may surprise you:

"[John McCain is putting]...the former mayor of a town of 9,000 with zero foreign policy experience a heartbeat away from the presidency."- official Obama campaign response.

That's right, the argument is about Palin's so-called "inexperience". Well, besides her having more experience than the Dems' POTUS candidate (13 years as a public official, 2 of those years managing the state of Alaska as Governor), we have a problem of hypocrisy.

Say McCain does die in office, and Palin is elected. She has zero foreign policy experience. Well, say she elects a foreign policy buff as her VP, to fill the gaps.

Sound like anyone familiar?

The Final Day of the DNC: More BS than Barack Soetoro

OK, starting kind of on time:

6:08: Mark Udall is finishing a speech. I honestly hope he doesn't get elected, because he's THE Boulder Congressman.

6:12: Tim Kaine speaks. John McCain house joke, practically ignored. People don't care about it anymore. Durr, vote for McCain if you have 7 houses. Talks about what he's done in Honduras. Compares his service to Barry's community organizer. Aren't we tired of a Washington which doesn't have faith in us? Obama will invest in us. We need to put our faith in to action, faith in the American dream, blah blah blah. For a guy who talks about faith, he sure doesn't know when it's appropriate. Tells stadium to move mountains. "Move, mountains!" Mountains don't budge an inch.

6:16: Bill Richardson welcomes the audience in Spanish. John McCain says you're all in here to follow a celebrity. You're really in here to follow a celebrity and elect him. McCain thinks people don't think for themselves. How ridiculous. McCain supported Big Tobacco. He doesn't think for himself. McCain has only changed his mind, he won't change America. He pays hundreds for his shoes, but we'll pay for his flip-flops. As far as I recall, Obama's been in politics way less than McCain but has flipped way more than him. Everything is terrible, McCain wants tax breaks for oil companies (those evil, evil oil companies!) and we need to stop global warming. Oh, did I mention global warming? McCain wants us in Iraq 100 years (I can't believe he says that, after all, it's been debunked about 1000 times). We need to invest here at home, where everything is falling apart, and we have 3% positive economic growth. Oops, did I just say that? Obama puts workers first because he supports unions. Yeah, look how great GM and US Steel are, thanks to unions. Does anyone want to see Cheney anymore? Noooooooo! He is just PANDERING to the crowd, now. Maybe he'll start kissing their feet. We need a President who respects the Bill of Rights! Shuts down Guantanamo! Stops torturing those poor terrorists! Then he speaks a lot of Spanish, the crowd cheers, even though they don't know what he just said. America needs chaaaaange! Question: Are we gonna win this election? My answer: Noooooooo!

Ugh. I still think he was the right choice for Obama's VP.

Hurry up, bring Obambi out. Let's just get this over with. Oh, wait, we still have Glorebal Warming to worry about.

6:32: Stevie Wonder. Well, I really care what he has to say. One celebrity rooting for another, I guess. He's singing a song that may or may not have anything to do with the convention. It's a nice song. Nice beat, very...nice. "A world that is color-free", "unity and harmony", etc. A bridge..."Baaaaarack O'baaaaaama"..."Yes we cannnnn", and the song's over. Doing another song. This one I've heard before. Stevie dedicated it to Barack and Michelle, how cute.

6:46: Al Gore is here. I bet we're gonna here this: Obama wants renewables, ending global warming, McCain doesn't. Obama will do all this crap to end global warming. We need to all do our part. Now, let's see if I'm right. Will we take this opportunity for change? We have to!! Talking about 2000 election, saying everything would be perfect because he'd be President. This election is like 2000. McCain wants Bush policies. It's like recycling. If you want change, vote Obama. Wow. Never heard that one. Obama is telling us what he'll do. The election is close right now because of the status quo is afraid of the change Obama represents. What!? Many scientists say Arctic ice will be completely gone in next 4 years. Even though it increased this year. Hmm. Climate crisis this, climate crisis that. For the economy, we need to end our reliance on carbon-based fuel. We have everything we need for using wind, solar, etc. Except for a President to force us to do it. Oops, I'm sorry. Inspire us to do it. Disses the oil companies. Republicans have the worst products. I hate Republicans. So now we have to pledge that we'll "be there" for Barack. We need to tell Republicans why we vote for Barack. It's time for a change, change, change. Young voters will vote for Barack, it's a sign of change. Idiot. Abe Lincoln-Barack Obama comparison. Dissing the Iraq war. Barack's experience has given him respect for diff. views. As long as they're his own. This is all about as true as ManBearPig. Half man, half bear, half pig hybrid that Al Gore is obsessed with hunting. We must serve the world, our future, our God Barack Obama by electing him. Keep drinking that Kool-Aid!

Looks like I was right, haha.

Dude just says Barack is polling 58%. I should check that. Yep, just like I thought. He was lying. But then again, he's an Obamafan, what does he know?

7:13: Susan Eisenhower. Talks about her family history. Democrats like Eisenhower. The divisions in our contry are deep and wide. We must restore our image, we squabble all the time. Barack has the right "temperament" to run the country. He can inspire us all. But what if he doesn't? What if some people just...aren't inspired? So many of his policies are based on the "inspiration of the American people" that apparently he's the king of. But he can't mobilize everyone, just the Democrats. And that is a major problem that at sometime he'll have to address.

7:18: Many, many admirals and generals come out for Obama. Obviously going to say he's the right choice for our military and veterans. Why do I even bother? Leadership, judgement of Obama is gooooood. Freedom isn't free, it costs folks like you and me. And if we don't chip in, we'll never pay that bill...I swear I've heard this before.

7:25: Joe Biden's going to introduce some delegates. Hello, Harry Reid! Praises the DNC. We're here for everyone who's been knocked down, blah blah. These are the people who are teaching our kids, raising our families. Listen to these people. OK, here we go.

7:30: Union dude, Roy Gross. Unions ruin things. Teamsters union. We were doing well, until Bush came along. Bush made all the jobs go away. The economy isn't working. MI will be for Obama, thank you.

7:32: Monica, from Ohio. Someone sent her a chain e-mail about Obama. She found out that Obama is a man of values. He fights for the people. John McCain wants to continue Bush policies. Einstein would say we're insane if we elect John McCain. Are these really the people teaching our kids? I hope not.

7:35: Janet Monaco: From RI. She works lots of hours in a store, wants government assistance. Bush and McCain, it's all their faults. Tax breaks for the rich, looking out for lobbyists. Yes we can, make a CHHAAAAANGE!!!! Awkward.

7:36: Teresa from NM. Because of her grandparents, she got a doctorate. Guess we don't need the government, then. Bush and McCain made our schools terrible. It's all their faults. We don't need four more years. Our schools are terrible! I should know, I was just in one for the last four years. To tell you the truth? IT WAS NOTHING LIKE SHE DESCRIBES. WHOO CHANGE!! Huge Mexican contingent starts chanting along in Spanish. I have no idea what they're saying.

7:39: Pam from NC. Wait til you hear what's happening to me. We used to have a home, cars, health insurance, etc. Then 8 years ago, Bush got into office. Her husband needed surgery, and so everything fell apart. What? How does this have anything to do with Bush? She was a lifelong Republican. Explains why her life was fine for the last 30 years. Now we don't need 4 more years! OMG!! CHANGE!

7:42: Another Obamacan. America was a place of great opportunity. Now the plant is closed. He recieved 9 days of severance pay. Bush's fault? Of course. Bush sent his job overseas. I'm going to vote Barack, the Heartland needs chaaaaange. Stupid.

Commercial time. Time to throw up from all the BS I've just been force-fed.

7:52: I took Rush's advice, and put up a "I'm inexperienced, so I don't know what I'm talking about, or just outright lying" caption at the bottom of my TV for when Obama speaks, which he is, in a few moments. Soooo, follow me and let's gooooooo!

7:54: NAACP gloats over the significance of Obama being elected. Makes it seem like a crime to vote for McCain. No wonder so many Repubs feel guilty because that's what they're going to do, disrupt these people's dreams. But honestly, even if it is historical, we can't afford him for his policies and inexperience, not to mention his dark side.

7:58: Come ONNNNNN, hurry UPPPPPP.

7:59: Dick Durbin to introduce a video to introduce Obama. Great. Fantastic. Let's see it. Basic intro, Americans hunger for change, we are tired of divisiveness. We see it in the eyes of the young people. We see it in the eyes of the old people. We see it in the eyes of the socialis- er, liberal people. Life prepared Obama to lead us. OK. I get it, you're saying the same stuff I've been drilled for the past 4 days. Obama knows that the best days are still to come? "America is no longer what it can be."- Obama

Yes We Can! Chant!! OK, finally done. Video time.

Showing the midwest, for some reason. It's not like Obama will win here. Obama clip from 2004 speech. His childhood was like any other, but it was his search for self that defined him. Talks about his absence of his father. Still waiting for the part where he obtains an Indonesian passport, acting as a citizen of Indonesia. His mother was angry when she saw injustice, and it passed on. Talks just barely about his community organizer days. His Saul Alinksy-inspired days. Talks about his relationship with Michelle. Now it misleads us about his legislation, like the myth of his "welfare to work" legislation. Now talks about his mom's passing away. Talks about his grandfather, who apparently was like a little boy. Knows what it's like to have a single mom, knows what it's like to watch grandparents age. It's a rather bipartisan video, no Democratic mention anywhere.

8:14: Obama enters! The messiah! People worship and wave their signs in praise! Cheering abounds, I think I heard someone faint! Obama looks down on his peasants. They won't stop cheering. It's making him mad! Stop, before thy god smite thee! Here it is, the big Kahuna of speeches. The mother lode. Oop, "yes we can, yes we can" starts up again! OK. Thanks Howard Dean and Dick Durbin. He accepts the nomination! Who knew!? People go insane, cameras flash. Thanks Hillary. Crowd cheers quietly. Thanks Slick Willy and Ted Kennedy and Joe Biden. Thanks Michelle and his kids. They get less cheering. We can all come together as an American family, that's how Baryy got to be where he is. Tonight, eveything is terrible. The economy, the war, and the failed policies of Bush we have to thank. Amurrca, we are better than this. Talks about the delegates who spoke earlier. Invokes Katrina. Says to everyone: Enough! Sire has spoken, fools. Disses Republicans. Crowd chants once more. Almost silent clapping for McCain's war service. What does it say about your judgement if you agree with Evil Bush? On issue after issue, McCain is not independent. Disses Phil Gramm. You can't call us whiners! Tell that to the people who are working hard, tell that to the military! Oh, wait, that's not who Gramm was talking about in the first place. Oops. McCain doesn't know America, or else he wouldn't joke about middle-class being under 5 million dollars. Crowd boos McCain. McCain doesn't care, he doesn't get it. Republican philosophy (conservatism) is bad. Socialism good. It's time for them to own their failure. Everything is just going to Hell in a handcart. Praises Clinton presidency. I look at my sign and laugh. Talks about college saving, to pander to his young followers. Talks about his mom again. Says his life hasn't been like a celebrity's life. That's BS, the celebrity thing refers to his candidacy. Besides, lots of celebrities have lived more accomplished lives than you, anyway. Does that qualify them to be President? Heck no. Government shouldn't solve our problems, but it should do what we can't do ourselves. It should help us. Reagan evoked: "The scariest 9 words in the world today are "I'm from the government, and I'm here to help."" He will punish companies that send jobs overseas. Gee, that sounds like a good idea. He'll cut taxes for the middle class, 95% of Americans. Hah hah hah. We'll cut our addiction to oil. McCain has been in Washington for 26 years. He forgets Biden has been there longer. Drilling is not a solution. But of course, he'll use other great fossil fuels, like natural gas and "clean coal". He will invest 150 billion dollars on technology that is useless to us. He'll give everyone universal Pre-K. He'll somehow make sure that every student gets a world-class education. He'll give me money for college if I promise to "work for the country". His socialized medicine will give everyone the kind of care that Washington gets, only he won't, because it'll turn out like the disaster they have in Britain. Equal pay stuff, again. Many of these plans will cost money. Closing corporate loopholes, going through the budget and eliminating programs that don't work. Can a President do that? Fulfilling these promises will require each of us to go green. We all have to take more responsibility. And what, you'll punish us if we don't? Because like you said, it only works if everyone does it. Challenges McCain, says he wants to debate. Talks about his opposition to the war. John McCain won't follow bin Laden. Bunch of crock. McCain stands alone in his refusal to end the war? Obama needs a dose of reality, then. You can't protect Israel by talking tough in Washington. What'll you do, invade it? We're the party of Kennedy, dont' tell me Democrats don't keep us safe. Uhh, Bay of Pigs, Cuban Missile Crisis, starting of the Vietnam War? Oh yeah, for sure. He'll end the war "responsibly". Which means cut-and-run. He'll make us great again. He looks forward to debating with McCain. Says McCain should stop attacking his character. Houses, anyone? The troops have served a united America. Praises America. Instead of cheering "USA", they cheer "Yes We Can". Attacks McCain again. We all have to cast off the politics of the past. Our sense of common purpose. We may not agree on abortion, but we agree on reducing unwanted pregnancy. We may not agree on same-sex marriage, but we can agree that gays deserve to visit their partner in hospitals. Don't tell me we can't uphold the 2nd Amendment and keep AK's out of the hands of criminals. You make a big election out of small things. What the naysayers don't understand is that the election isn't about me, it's about you. Change doesn't come from Washington, it comes to Washington. The change we need is coming. Then he pads his "accomplishments" again. Talks about Obamacans (8% of Repubs). Praises America again, like everything isn't terrible and gloomy. The American promise. It's that promise that made MLK speak of his dream. Talks about MLK's speech. We have to go forward, into the future, etc. Hold steady, keep going, without wavering. Aaand it's over.

And it was just OK.

That's it, it wasn't anything that I haven't heard before. I've heard the exact same stupid crap for the last 4 nights, in fact. All I can think is...that's it? That's what they made the huge setup for, that huge stadium filled, that strange set? For that?

If I bought tickets, I'd have felt gypped. Wait, I do feel gypped. This ate up 12 hours of my freakin' time. Now we've got the Remember the Titans theme. Fireworks, too. I'm sure Keith Olbermann has peed himself with happiness. But he didn't really give me proof that I should vote for him. Just a speech that could have been delivered by any politician. Especially a dishonest one like Obama.

Oooh, closing thoughts from Mark Shields and David Brooks. "This is like nothing we've ever seen." Yeah, it's like a combination of the Olympics and a motivational speaker. With a mediocre speech. "A truly historic night that will reverb around the nation, whether they want it or not." I don't even know what to say to that. "It'll be hard to label him as a conventional liberal." Hmm, no it won't, just look at his record. Will you believe the paper trail, or will you believe whatever he tells you? I think that's a huge issue for this campaign, people just treat his words as truth because he's an orator. He just SOUNDS like he's telling you what he's going to do. People in the audience are crying. This is pathetic.

Another commentator was underwhelmed. Looks like I'm not alone.

Well, I can say it wasn't a waste of time, since I really didn't expect much. But I pose to you this question, on the subject of unity: How are Obama's left-wing policies any more divisive than GWB's right-winged ones? If anything, the left-winged ones will be affecting more lives, because of the huge increase in the scope of government.

I'm out for the night. Buh-bye.

Day 3 of the DNC: It's Like We're There!

It's 6:21, and I'm in an incredibly bad mood, thanks to my last post. Expect hostility.

Dang it! I've missed part of Harry Reid, that repulsive Senate majority leader.

6:21: Harry Reid gives no solutions, but criticizes John McCain's promise to drill at home. I told you them Dems would go back on their pro-drilling leanings.

6:22: Michele Jones: She's in the Army. Now, I doubt she'll diss it. OK, she endorses Obama. He's the most qualified to serve as CIC? How? I expect proof. He'll bring change. His record is dandy. He'll make sure they can accomplish their missions. He understands veterans, because he's one himself, right? Obviously references the pork-loaded GI Bill that McCain voted against. She became impressed when Obama recognized a brain-cancer inflicted soldier because she told him to. That apparently speaks volumes. Aaaand that's it. Of course, I just listened to a bunch of nothing. Still, I have the utmost respect for her because she served in the Army.

6:28: A lot of veterans. I respect their service. Displays a gloomy army scene. "Sir, what are we doing over here [in Iraq]?" Uhh, maybe you forgot your job. Maybe you should take a little peek at this article. President spent billions on private contractors. More than body armor. Is that true? I'll have to check. Now we can fight in Afghanistan! That's where the terrorists are who did 9/11! Well, you idiot, most were from Saudi Arabia, where a great many terrorists are from. You wanna invade there? Heck no.

I'm just waiting for Joe Biden.

6:33: Madeline Albright, secretary to the UN. You know how much I criticize the UN, right? Brags about her credentials. The world is different today. We can't aford 4 more years, like the past 8 years. How many times have I typed that? We can't trust Republicans with foreign policy. We're not safer, a distortion of McCain's 100 year remark. Makes a strawman argument against McCain's experience. Barack will speak to the youth, like me! Turn back the intolerance and hate!! Barack has magic powers to do all these foreign policy things, but we've never seen him do it, so how do we know? He'll keep the country secure. How do we know? We don't. Politics of fear, etc. We need to work for Obama. I'm dead serious, she just said that when Obama is President we need to work to him.

6:39: Evan Bayh. This is gonna be boring. Yay, Bush will be gone in 5 months! Unless McBush is elected. Oh, crap! John McCain will pay trillions for foreign oil. He'll continue fiscal irresponsibility. Fundamentals of economy comment reference, AGAIN. Where do they get this "10 billion a month in Iraq" figure? I've heard it about 30 times in the last 3 days. No solutions, no reasons to vote Obama. Soldiers were killed because of Bush's incompetence, not because of Islamic extremists. Wtf!? John McCain is not a bad man. I bet everyone disagrees in that audience. Paints gloomy picture of economy. He'll do all these things that he promised, he'll do this, he'll do that, he'll reduce the deficit, he'll end the war, he'll do all these things, just like Jimmy Carter. Har har. John McCain took the low road. Yep, just like Obama, if you didn't notice. Let's get the job done.

6:46: Jack Reed. From RI. Praises Obama and America. His father was a janitor, so obviously he understands the middle class. Impressed that troops respected Obama. Wow, who expected it. The military sure seems to be the theme tonight. For 8 years, McCain fell in line with Bush for every foreign policy decision. That is such a fricking lie. He was very opposed to Bush/Rumsfeld's handling of the war for almost four years. McCain was wrong on Iraq. Right. Sen. McCain wants to stay in Iraq forever, spending 10 billion every month. Number one, NO, and number two, WHERE DOES HE GET THAT FIGURE!? Barack has laid a vision, blah blah. He will unite America, except for conservatives, I guess. Hmm.

6:53: Why are they consulting Walter Mondale on anything related to winning an election?

OK, I finally found the studies which say that the US has neared 10 billion dollars in spending a month for the conflict. Just making sure, I don't want anything to slip by.

There's some weird music thing going on. I can't discern the tune, it seriously sounds like tribal music. Or, like, some stupid hippie crap.

7:02: Bill Cinton time! FL kid here to introduce him. FL is going Republican this year! When a Democrat is in the White House, it's a wonderful thing. Jimmy Carter, much? Clinton has a huge positive legacy, apparently. "The last great Prez of the United States". Right. We'll see if history remembers the same thing. There's Slick Willy! I expect lies. Thank you. Thank you. I feel your pain. Sit down, ahhahhahhah! Please stop. Stop. Please sit. I am here to support Barack. Really? Not Hilldog? I'm here to warm up the crowd for Biden, who will tell some wonderfully fantastic lies. Talks about Hillary. Bill wants Hilldog supporters to vote for Obama. Here's why: our nation is in trouble, middle class is hurting, inequality is rising (?), food prices rising, position in the world weakened (with great countries like Syria and Zimbabwe). So give me a reason to vote Obama. No reasons yet. He's a great motivational speaker. He has intelligence (?), he is superior to Republicans (?), his life experience gives him unique way to lead. Primary tested him. On running mate, he hit it out of the park. Lots of people would disagree, Bill. Talks about Joe Biden. Barry is ready. No, just kidding. More prommises. He'll end the battle against AIDS. He'll choose diplomacy first. He'll stand up to the adversries that he can't convert to partners. Everything will just be fricking dandy when Obama's elected. Booing the Republicans. Dissing the Republicans. What about Katrina and cronyism? America can do better than that. The Obamacult starts chanting, I swear I just saw one girl crying. Whenever McCain is mentioned, he gets boos, even when Clinton mentions McCain in a positive light. Disses conservatism. Whatever happened to tolerance? This speech is too long. He's really mobilizing them to just hate and despise Republicans. Apparently in 1990 the Republicans said that being governor of Arkansas isn't experienced enough? It's way more experience than Obamatron has. Obama will lead us to unity and hope. Know what I just realized? Why doesn't the RNC let Rush and Sean speak at the convention? They could tear this crap apart.

Where's Biden? We want Joe Biden!

7:35: Oh great, it's Kerry. 4 years ago. I lost. Haha. This time we're gonna win. McCain would look like George Bush. McCain voted with Bush 90% of the time. Last year, when he was campaigning. Extremism crowds out common sense. Where? McBush mislead the country. Bush lied, people died, etc. President Obama will shut down Guantanamo, 'cause of those poor terrorists. We don't have any friends in this world? Are you kidding? We need to provide for the world. Candidate McCain is different from Senator McCain. References his own flip-flops. McCain should finish the debate with himself. He's using Karl Rove tactics. He of course doesn't give any evidence or reasoning to back this up, but that's what I expected. Makes fun of the Iraq war. He wants us to lose. Girl in audience nods her head and says "exactly". The Republicans have been wrong again and again. McCain just has personal attacks. Nobody can question Obama's patriotism. Really? I sure can. Barack's uncle is here, because he helped liberate a concentration camp. You don't decide who's service counts and who doesn't. What a hypocrite! Tell that to Wesley Clark! Aaaand he's done.

7:49: Lt General, obviously here to say that Barack will be a good CIC, evidenced by the fact that she is in the Army. It doesn't matter if it's true, she'll just say it. Everyone thinks they know Barack. Why don't they ever talk about the real him, then? Yep, there it is. She said it. Torture is ineffective? That's new. This convention is just made for soundbites. This lady, for example, just says one soundbite-sentence after another! Pride, not pity. Blah, blah blah, blah.

Commercials time. That means time to get my head straight.

7:59: Bill Richardson; he's the one I thought should have been the VP. Would have been a verrry smart choice for Obama. Oh, wait, he's not speaking. Hah!

7:59: It's Chet Edwards, he sounds EXACTLY LIKE GEORGE BUSH. I closed my eyes, it's him in a Chet Edwards suit. Obama has served this country militarily by serving on the veterans' committee. Wow, that's hard stuff. Tax-cuts for Exxon? The tax cuts are for every company, idiot! Exxon is included! Veterans can't afford 4 more years. If I was 14 years old again, I'd be eating up this crap, yeah, vote Obama! Now I can do research, though, and I see a completely different story. Unfortunately, many people in that audience have the same mentality that I did...when I was around 14. Anyway, what were we talking about? We're still the home of the brave. What a rousing speech. He said nothing. Oh, now we're watching a Spielberg film. For Democrats. About youth? Being part of the military? Images of war and destruction, unhappy veterans. Well, let me ask you something. When you go into the military, WHAT DO YOU EXPECT? IT'S NOT PRETTY. Traditional anti-war film. It's hard to come back. Woman talks about how gold star on a flag signifies a loss. Dramatic moment ensues. It's the typical tactic to rally against the war. Tom Hanks appears, acknowledges freedom isn't free. Film ends, applause. OMG! WEHAVETOENDTHISWARBUSHANDCHENEYSTARTEDITFOROILENDTHEOILWARRRR!!! More talking about Obama's judgment.

8:18: Joe Biden's nomination. Waiting for him, waiting....waiting...oh, and some woman is talking about women's rights. But that's normal at the DNC. I place the nomination for Biden to be our next VP! Yeahhhh!! Yeeesss!! ehhhhh....very awkward moment.

Nancy Pelosi appears. Nominates Biden. Tells the crowd to nominate Biden. Biden, Pelosi says, accepts.

Biden video. Talking about Biden's family's car accident. Says he relates to his constituents. He's most proud of his Violence Against Women Act. Flip-flops majorly on his 2007 Iraq war stance, now says it was unnecessary. "The middle class...OUR future". Does he think he's middle class? Video ends, Beau Biden speaks. Apparently there's a big scandal that's happened with Biden and one of his sons. Bo Biden talks about the car accident. Makes Biden out to be a working-class hero, "not part of Washington though he was in it". It's so obvious right now, while he's speaking, how much more his father has lived life than Obama. Way more accomplishments, more emotional backstory. Introduces Joe Biden.

8:31: We Republicans prepare for the lies against Bush, Republicans, and McCain. I won't respond to his speech, just write down what he says. Thank you, thank you. Soaking it all up. Praises his son. "I'm a hell of a success." Says Clinton brought us so far along. Praises Hillary. Honored to represent Delaware. Yes, I accept your nomination to run with the messiah. Praises his mom, who's in the audience. Things are going pretty lightly so far. Talks about his stuttering. In America, everyone is equal to you. Washington watches people get knocked down and doesn't help them up. Well, it's your Congress. Bush left America in shambles. John McCain will do the same. McCain doesn't get it. Obama is the great American story. Talks about Obama's days as a community organizer. Work is about looking you child in the eye and telling him it's going to be all right. Moved people from welfare to work. We don't have the accept the situation we're in, we change it. John McCain is his great friend. John McCain doesn't want to take the country in the right direction. 100 million American families? Wants to give companies tax breaks but not middle-class. John McCain voted against renewables. He voted 19 times against minimum wage. That's not change, that's more of the same. The choice is clear. Obama will reform the tax code. He'll cut taxes for the middle class. He'll free us from foreign oil. If Obama wins, I get college money. Obama will give us socialized health care. He'll put more cops back on the street, give equal pay to women. As we gather here tonight, our country is less secure and more isolated. Bush hasn't adressed China, Russia, and India as powers. Barack will hold Russia accountable. Bush's policy has been a failure. We can't afford 4 more years. McCain is wrong on Afghanistan, Obama is right. The Taliban and Al-Qaeda are planning more attacks. We shouldn't trust McCain's judgement. We should talk to Iran. Again and again, McCain is wrong and Obama is right. After 6 long years, we're almost bringing our troops home. Again and again on national security, Obama is right. Remember when the world used to trust us? Joe is ready to join Barack. We've been knocked down, we have to get knocked up. This is an extraordainary election. It's Barack's time.

Holy sacred cow, that's a lot of BS. I don't even want to touch that with a 10-foot-pole.

8:56: Surprise guest! It's the Obambi himself! O NOES! We wasn't expectin' that, your majesty. Please, have mercy on us. Cheering. Too much of it. I wanted to come out here to say that I'm so proud to have the Bidens on my team. He thinks the convention's gone well. Another lapse in judgment, I suppose. Barack "Babyface" Obama references Hilldog and Billdog. Al Sharpton is sitting next to Bill. Explains why he wants the convention to move to Invesco Field tomorrow. Caters to his adoring disciples- er, fans- er, supporters. They really made this into a huge thing.

OK, I've had enough of Obama kissing and hugging his prominent supporters so I'll just cut this thing short-

I see how it's easy to fall into the trap of liberal, Democratic ideology. I got force-fed it this entire past 3 days, and I have to admit that it can be pretty appealing on the outside. But then I remember how it really works, and I get mad. Mad that these people spend all this time misleading their supporters. How the Obamamania is disturbing and shallow, and how liberalism can't hold a candle to the virtue of conservatism. I may be in a really bad mood, but I'm keeping my head up. The messiah's speech is tomorrow.

Something Wicked This Way Comes

I'll be frank: a terrible thing has happened. The GOP is crafting their party platform. Now, they have the opportunity to satisfy the conservative base once and for all; return to the Reagan principles that truly define the Republican party. For unlike the last platform we had, 40,000 words and filled with useless commendations and whatnot, this platform has the opportunity to bring us, well, back to our roots.

But you know what? You know what those idiots drafting the platform did?

Y'know what they did?

They threw all that away for the noble and just cause of...not conflicting with McCain's past (read: "independent") positions.

This election is now ours to win, and by God, our so-called party leaders seem hell-bent on losing.

READ THIS, AND BECOME DISGRUNTLED.

Day 2 of the Dem Convention: Live-Blogging the Stupidity

Dang it, starting late again. Oh well. Lots of good stuff in store. By the way, I'm watching PBS with Jim Lehrer.

6:33: Someone who looks like Barbara Boxer speaks. Parrots that McCain wants more of the same. At least McCain is honest when he says economics isn't his forte. Goes over all of Obambi's pipe dreams. She's almost high on the messiah. Invokes Phil Gramm. Says we're not whiners. Obama will bring change to fit the failed ways of Washington. That's so specific. More Dem talking points that I've heard about 100 times.

6:37: Gwen interviews. Having women lead beside men will change everything. Yeah, just look in any household. Says Hilldog wanted the Democratic power for herself for a long time. We're making our way [to the Presidency]. Maybe you will if the delegates actually vote their feelings.

6:40: Round-table. Younger generation has different mentality. Condescends to us. Thanks. Talking about 18-year-old Obama delegate. Not insult if Obama were to pick another woman besides Hill for VP? Yeah, in your dreams. Praising women college students. Men never get to be proud, I guess.

6:44: Bill Ritter! Tax hike-looming Bill. Wants a new-energy economy. Wants wind turbines in CO. Schmuck Schumer says Reagan was wrong, we all need government. We can't pay tuition bills. Says McCain will just cut taxes. Is blatant misrepresentation also a theme at the DNC? America will accept tax increases. Class-baits and says Americans think the redistribution of wealth is a great thing. Ritter says Schumer hit nail on the head. Right. People at the lower margins are hit harder, even though they pay about 3% of all taxes? Says people don't know Barack, that's why he's so close in the polls with McCain. That's fine, when they get to know him beyond the superficiality they won't like what they see. Ritter talks about Independents. That's how he won his election. Energy is good for the economy, who knew? Schumer says "we understand the middle class". That's the Democratic myth. John McCain doesn't have good plans. They're hurting, want chaaaaaange.

6:52: There's a Republican! Mayor of Fairbanks. Another traitor. He's not here to speak against McCain. He's here to endorse Obama. What? Everyone has a vote. He's drunk the Obama kool-aid. Keen intellect? Foreign policy based on logic? Economy based on families? We won't get that from Obama, fool. No, we won't. Says we need to use our own resources, doesn't mention oil.

6:56: Laid-off textile worker. Well, it must be Bush's fault. In 2003, plant shut down. Must have been Bush. CEO got a huge bonus. I wonder if it was his fault? Doesn't offer any reasons why the plant shut down that could be attributed to Bush. She's living at poverty level. Bush doesn't say "just go to college", you liar. Now we struggle to get by...WITHOUT HEALTH INSURANCE!! OMG!! I thought you might have meant something truly needed, like food. We can't take four more years. Yeah, it's your fault that you're an unskilled worker. Know what? Stop relying on the government to give everything to you on a silver platter and take some initiative.

6:59: Nancy Floyd of Oregon. Worked on renewable energy. She got her hands dirty building a wind farm. Says we're at the same point as 30 years ago, back at another energy crisis. There are people with new solutions. Fine, bring them on. John McCain is for all renewables, as long as we use everything. That's why we need Obama. Huh? Stumbles over her words. Green technology is great, blah blah. Other countries have "stable" energy policies. Just because we don't integrate alternative energy companies with the federal government doesn't mean they can't succeed!! She keeps talking about new jobs. Somehow he'll regulate the entire energy industry. She acknowledges that it sounds pie-in-the-sky. Go Barack!

Oy vey, off to a great start. I'm feelin' the hate towards Republicans.

7:05: Another round-table. Green argument will be made in terms of jobs. So can the oil argument.

7:06: Kathleen Sebelius. A ghastly woman. Just ghastly. Supposed to be Obama's VP. Barack was raised by Kansans? OK, just not in Kansas. Today we face huge challenges, dreary everything, doom, gloom, the American dream has become a nightmare for the 5% of homeowners who face foreclosures. Says McCain can't remember how many homes he has. Makes a terrible hypocritical joke: McCain doesn't know home, from home, from home. Yeah, it's such a huge crime to own multiple houses. I bet Kerry would agree, along with Ted Kennedy. McCain wants "country-club" economics. John McCain promises more of the same, he wants to compromise your retirement. Doesn't she realize that by not privatizing Social Security, she is posing an even bigger risk? Says McCain opposes remewables, a complete lie. Ghastly. Fix our divisive politics--look at you! Are you that much of a moron!? Sheesh.

7:12: Pena speaks. Former secretary of energy. Says we used to have a bad problem with air pollution in Denver. We made a decision to change. Everyone helped--and guess what? He says it got cleaner, but have you been to Denver lately? The last time I went, I saw so much smog that I tried to take short breaths on the way down. That worked. Our addiction to oil is the cause of all the problems we have. Bush's fault, of course, for giving to the oil companies. The theme tonight: McCain, more of the same. We can't afford more of the same. And here it is: CHAAAAAAAAAAAANGE. He's going to invest 150 Billion dollars over 10 years for renewables. Idk, that might conflict with Al Gore's plans. Speaking of which, isn't he later tonight? Great. Invokes the Apollo mission to the moon, which is actually an inaccurate comparison. Colorado has a green economy? Heh heh heh. Because we're the host state, we have to be an example of Democratic paradise.

7:20: Starting to get bored again. This convention is just a redux of everything you read on the candidate's website or liberal editorials. What is the point? Also, I want to bring something up just in case they address it. Obama called McCain "the biggest celebrity in Washington", for what reason, is a mystery. All politicians are famous. They have to be, to get elected. But there's a difference between being famous and being a celebrity, like Obama. I want to go check the RNC speakers list. Great, some RINOs, some not. But all better for the country than anyone at the DNC.

7:25: Robert Casey, Jr. Who's this? Gov. Casey's son. Yippee. For the last 8 years we've been hit hard by the Bush-Cheney economy. Huh? More like this past 7 months. The other times have been, well, fairly sweet, economically speaking. Says Obama bridges connections in the Senate, finding common ground. Like when? Everywhere Barack went, people saw his statistics listed on his campaign site. He's a father, etc. Yay. Joe Biden reference. Lobbyists call the shots, now? Proof? Hillary Clinton intro! OK, where is she? Stop talking. Now since you intro'd her, nobody cares. Opposes Barack on abortion. Barack is postpartisan though, so it doesn't matter. McCain votes with Bush 90% of the time. Well, Barack votes with Reid 100% of the time. That's not a sidekick, that's a soulmate. Cheering for Obama. It's like a strange cult. 4 More Months! I'm going to have a hearty laugh when McCain wins.

7:33: I-didn't-catch-her-name-speaks. On women's equality. I'm pretty sure Republicans are for that, too. Bad timing, I guess. The fight for equality isn't over. She sounds like Forrest Gump. She got smaller raises than her male co-workers. Such a pity. The Supreme Court sided with her business. I'm sure they had their reasons. Just so she knows, there's 4 conservatives, 4 liberals, and one independent in the SC. So it's not Republicans' fault, like she claims. This apparently happened 30 years ago. Business has changed since then, you know.

7:40: Mark Warner speaks. Here we go, he's the keynote speaker. He's introduced. Oh, boy. The keynote speech will probably reference McCain. Hello Virginia! The race for the future has begun. No American need be left behind. President is stuck in the past. I didn't know there was a subspace rip in the White House. His first company failed, along with his second. Maybe he wasn't meant for business. Praises America profusely, well, that I haven't heard in a while. Everyone should get a fair shot. Well, are you anti-affirmative action, then? There it is, the McCain reference. Dissing Bush's energy policies. His biggest criticism of Bush is that he doesn't tap into the character and resolve of the American people. Actually, he did ask us to step up, but you Dems just can't stop making fun of his absence of articulacy. McCain is more of the same. A plan to explode the deficit (unlike Obama, who will completely expand it with 800 Billion of new spending). China's goin' for the gold, so we'd better not fall behind. Praise for China, just like the messiah. The plug-in hybrid vehicles within 10 years myth. We'll have an administration that actually believes in science. I suppose that's a reference to Bush's opposition to stem-cell research. He kept denying to allow it until we were able to generate them from underneath skin layers, an ethical way. What a sin. We need to expand the military. Only, you Dems don't have to do it, don't worry, just leave it to those pro-war Republicans to join. This election is not about left vs right. Uh, yeah, it kind of is. We have an obligation for the children, blah blah blah. We're all in this together, that's what Dems believe. Oh, except for Republicans. We hate them. Warner talks about Virginia. We need government-controlled internet now? A company brought jobs to a small-town, and that town grew thanks to it. What does that have to do with Dem philosophy at all? It sounds more pro-business than anything else. Says Obama is like Jefferson. I'm pretty sure Jefferson had more experience.

There is a ton of people just saying the same thing: we need the future, not the past. What the heck? No matter who the next President is, we move into the future. The only difference is whether we move in on liberal or conservative policies.

I swear, all this sugar-coated, honey-sweetened, sickly-sweet, vague dialogue of nothingness is making me sick.

8:06: Hillary is coming up soon. Thank God, I'm so bored. At least all this live-blogging gets me ready for college, where you have to come up with witty responses for everything, when you're discussing it. Michelle Mybelle Obama is up. She says she wasn't re-introducing Barack, just introducing him again on a bigger stage. Right. He needs the re-introduction like Michael Jackson needs psychological counseling. She says Barack is less-concerned about tearing down his opponent than talking about the issues. Very important point here, especially with ALL of Barack's recent ads aimed at tearing down McCain and his shrill attacks on the Senator from Arizona at his rallies (houses, anyone?). What a bunch of bunk. Bring on Hilldog!

8:18: No!! Now we have to re-play the speech by Deval Patrick. Great. I grew up in poverty, I grew up middle-class. This is a badge of honor for Dems, they don't dare mention growing up in privilege. The American story is at risk today. The poor are a mess today, even though our "poverty" level is no match for those in East and West Europe and Asia and South America and Africa. The middle-class are one paycheck away from being poor, whatever that means. We can't force kids into math and science, that's communism! John McCain sayssss this, but he's against more spending for schools. He's against the Board of Education, one of the worst bureaucracies ever created (but he IS for vouchers, which makes all that irrelevant!). McCain is more of the same. Republicans deserve to lose, woo, divisive! Uses the South Side of Chicago as a positive example of community. I laugh out loud. Government is the name we give to the things we choose to do together. Wow, what BS. They're gonna ask Republicans to cooperate. That is gonna be fail.

8:26: History lesson. Great.

8:34: Hillary time, video first. Then Chelsea. Crowd is booing at something. Governor of Montana is introducing the video. John McCain says "No We Can't" to Obama's energy plan. That's because his energy plan is impossible and unrealistic. There's Bill Clinton. Stand up, everyone! We want 'em to hear you! Can we afford more of the same? Noooo! Time for change? Yeaaaaa! Who's gonna lead us? Jesu-er, Barack Obamaaaaa!!

8:38: Hilldog video. Hillary was a creepy kid. Talking about women's rights. Bill is referred to as "Hillary's husband". Hilldog's supporters drool to their candidate's soundbites to a mainstrem rock soundtrack. Calls the creepy cackle a "loud guffaw". Makes it sound like she's still in the running. She'll be known as the woman who reached to fight for everyone to be what they could be, by running for president. Aren't they forgetting something--she lost!

8:43: Hillary enters. This is crucial. D-man thinks she'll keep it low-key as possible so she has another shot at running in the future. He's probably right. Everyone has a Hillary sign, isn't that sweet? She's proud of everything. Supports Obama. It's a fight for the future. Disses Republicans, says they squander her accomplishments. No way, no how, no McCain. I have a feeling that slogan'll stick with them for a while. They made her laugh and cry. Awwww. Uses mother with cancer as propaganda for socialized medicine. Class-baits a bit, sends her love to Puerto Rico. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. We didn't really make history, but that's ok. Believes America should all be Democratic. She ran for the middle class, because of the big deficits, and Russia, and all the doom and gloom that she wants to exist. Completely demonizes Republicans. We'll join with out allies to combat global warming and terrorism (those are related, apparently). Says the current administration treats everyone else as invisible. Appeals to her supporters to not just vote for her, but vote for liberalism. Progress is never easy. It will be impossible without Obama. America pads the pockets of oil speculators? That's ridiculous! Obama will fight for the middle class. Obama will fight for the middle class. He'll fight for the poor, too. Praise for President Clinton. Just think of what America will be with President Obama. Not a pretty picture, no thanks. Says she will make Obama have a Hillarycare plan. Praise for Joe Biden. He's pragmatic, tough, and wise, everything Obama isn't. Hillary lies about her "friend", McCain. A lot. McBush reference, lame joke. Obaumatons eat it up. She's a senator because of the Seneca Falls convention? Hmm, I'd think it was more because of her lust for power. Harriet Tubman quote to mobilize Dems, keep going. "We're Americans, we're not big on quitting." Oh really? What about Harry Reid's surrender to Iraq? Vague, vague, vague. Dream big, keep going, etc. Aaaahh! We love you, Hilldog! She leaves, on that note.

Wouldn't it be funny, instead of just preaching hope and vague promises, the RNC just concentrated on policy and talked specifics? Realistic specifics, for realistic solutions.

And with that, I've just wasted another 3 hours. Good night, and good luck.

Never Live-Blog the DNC When You're in a Bad Mood

OK, I'm starting this at 6:28, right after Pelosi speaks:

6:28: Pelosi gives a very generic, doddering speech for the messiah, Lord Barack. "He's a 21st-century patriot", "blessed by God" public servant, all that's missing is people with hands raised in worship. Oh, wait, never mind.

6:30: Crowd cheers for an unknown speaker. Meanwhile, our correspondant interviews an elderly Dem who doesn't have anything to say that nobody hasn't heard. Thanks.

6:31: Jimmy Carter tribute. Talking about New Orleans, says it's Bush's fault (not really the mayor's fault, right?). Dems sure love scenes of destruction. Why don't they give a tribute to his years as President? Oh, yeah. New Orleans = poverty-stricken parts of the world. Obama paints part of a house for the cameras. Evil insurance companies didn't let one lady collect, but college students helped her. That's why we need a Democrat...so college students can relax.

Why aren't they showing any fixed parts of NO?

6:35: Yippee! Carter comes out. Dems cheer. Republicans wince, remembering the history of Carter's term. Stagflation is a funny word.

6:37: Old man class-baits in the back room. Says Republicans advantage the wealthy. Janet Napolitano says Dems reach across the aisle. She forgot Barack, though, He didn't.

6:39: Maya Soetoro! She has a really strange accent. Makes Barry sound like an unprivileged kid, unlike he really was. Says Barry's mom gave him a telescope to look at the world. Maybe someone should remind her that those are for looking outside the world? Barack has given everyone bountiful opportunity. How? Come on.

6:44: Jesse Jackson, Jr. Invokes MLK. Is wrong to do so. How is it that people think Barry can really be compared to those blacks who suffered in our country? Every time he mentions Obama, crowd goes wild. Says he had incredible record in state senate, which is a complete lie. Also says he reached across the aisle. He did, only a couple times. Says Illinois is America. Who's Alan Keyes, then? Says the south is "agrarian". Maybe he forgot about Texas. Don't get me wrong, Jackson's a good speaker. But like Obambi, all his stuff just lacks substance. We rise and fall as one people. How many times I've heard that...

I think I heard someone faint.

Build common ground, heal wounds of the last 8 years, will unite us, blah blah blah, there is NOTHING to suggest Obama would unite us.

6:52: Biden looks like white-haired Al Gore. Hmm. Nobody references Jackson's father's comment "I wanna cut hit n*ts off"? Have we forgot that, already? Jimmy Carter, here. He's a great person. Says Hillary voters will go to Obama. I laugh in anticipation, it's like dramatic irony. HE MENTIONED JOHN EDWARDS! You aren't supposed to do that! Wow, Carter says Obama has enough experience as 1-term Senator. Bum on Carter's left suggests McCain is ahead of Obama because of race. Carter agrees, says GA, NC and FL will go for Obama. Is he serious?

Carter cried in front of TV when Obama gave speech in Philly. Another swooner. Says Obama will end racism when he's Prez. Right.

7:03: Talking with a round-table about Jimmy Carter. Nothing interesting here. Elevating Carter's status. I'd recommend textbooks for history rather than this, there's less propaganda.


There's nothing really happening, so I'll get back to you when something of note happens. For now, it's just the regular Dem talking points and praise for Obama. I can't watch this.

7:17: Caroline Kennedy introduces Ted Kennedy, just before his video tribute. Caroline disses Repubs, calls Obama like her father. Anyone notice how she bares a close resemblance to Ann Coulter? Praises Ted, or "uncle Teddy". Tribute starts. Teddy talks about the sea. It's great. Yay. Video of him sailing. I wonder how many houses he has? If someone asked, he probably wouldn't remember, due to his recent problems. Does it even matter? No. He's been fighting for socialized healthcare all his time in the Senate. Still hasn't gotten it. Hopefully he never will. Says healthcare is a right. Well, we are not allowed to not give care based on if the patient has insurance or money. Does he realize this? Government is not the solution to our healthcare woes. Cheesy inspirational music finish.

Tedward comes out, everyone cheers. Supposedly he's going to make a short speech. He seems like a genial fellow. I still disagree with his policies, though. Yes We Can reference. Says Obama will end racial, "agendal", and straight-vs-gay conflict. That's the most bizarre thing anyone's said yet. Says it was John Kennedy's idea to go to the moon. I'd have thought it was the space administration's. Seems pretty certain Obama will be elected. Lots of great words, "hope", "dream", etc. Now hugging, "doo-wop" music, commentary about his last statement, "the dream lives on".

I'll be back when the next good speaker comes on, since it's another round-table. And some commercials.

8:00: It's the final hour. Correspondant says that Republican Jim Leach will speak for Obama, along with the first woman Senator to endorse Obama. Then, finally, Michelle My-belle Obama.

8:03: Strategist correctly asserts that there is little, if any, Republican excitement for Obama. People don't identify with Jim Leach. Pollster incorrectly asserts that Obama's getting 10% of the Republican vote. It's more likely 7-8%, if that. Look at the Newsweek investigation into the mythical Obamacon masses.

8:06: Here's Jim Leach, Republican traitor. Says we've been diminished by the last 8 years. Wants change. He sounds exactly like any Obama supporter, Democratic or not. I haven't heard any reasons to vote Obama besides vague statements bashing Washington's "partisanism". The audience is starting to talk over him! He's not a very good speaker. He also praises Al Gore, and talks about Global Warming a bunch. Is this guy really a Republican? Here we go again, the myth that Obama is bipartisan. Or postpartisan. Whatever. Disses McCain a bit, says he wants to continue exact same Bush policies, a lie, of course. Brings up the Great Depression and WWII, as if our times are really as desperate as those. I can't wait to see what everyone at FreeRepublic has to say about this. Transcending figure? Where's the proof?

8:14: It turns out that Jim Leach wrote that speech. Really? I could have written that speech, too. I wouldn't want to, but I could certainly do it. Someone says that Independents are going to vote for Obama. What? McCain is owning in that group. Some idiot calls Republicans 'Whigs'. Whigs were only united against Andrew Jackson, they didn't really have a cohesive party platform.

8:18: MO politician says MO will turn blue. Not a chance, Missouri's been a red state for a long time. Obama doesn't have enough appeal to convert it. Michelle Omaha gets a reference. There is not a lot of substance, here. Class-baiting, McBush name-calling, Big Oil demonizing. This lady is one traditional Dem. Says Obama hasn't taken a dime from lobbyists. That's a lie. What a ghastly woman. Protection of Social Security? Uhh, let's not go there. Says McCain has campaign run by lobbyists, and that he "recently" (more like a few months ago) said the economy was fundamentally strong. More class-baiting against the rich. I wasn't expecting this out of her. I didn't hear this from Teddy. You want us to be united, yet you keep dissing Republicans. I hope MO de-elects her.

8:25: Michelle "Not Proud" Obama tribute. Met Barack at a law firm. Barack pretends to be modest. Their whole love story goes on, and on...and on...Michelle has done a lot of community service. Service seems to be a theme in the first ladies this year, considering Cindy McCain's mountainous amount of service in Mother Teresa's orphanage, campaign to remove land mines from civilian areas, etc. I'm sure she's a fantastic person, but she's a bit anti-American.

8:30: Michelle's brother. He's pretty nervous. Says Michelle has memorized every episode of the Brady Bunch, along with calling him down to his sports games and waking him up early. I doubt it. Says the same things that the trubute provided. Uses basketball analogies, because apparently being the President means taking the shot when it's open and being a team player. I wonder what the Presidential equivilant of passing is, then?

8:38: We're almost done, I think. And if we're not, I'll just stop after MyBelle Obama anyway. OK, so here she is, soaking up the praise. Acknowledges her brother. She comes here as a mom. Her own mom looks strangely blank. She is happy to be there, blah blah. Motivational speaking to "our children". Instead of going to Wall Street (considering he's not a banker or investor or economist, I'm not surprised) he went to become a community organizer. Barack doesn't accept the world as it is. Is that tolerant? Brings up military families. Young people take care of those who can't take care of themselves...people like Hillary Clinton. Huh? She loves this country because of its hope. So if we all didn't hope, she wouldn't love it? She's really getting excited. Brings up the "women should get equal pay for equal work" concept for about the 3rd time. Seems to be common sense, but OK. Barack will give everyone universal preschool, universal health care and universal mental health care. How does he pay for this, again? Thanks for being so specific. Barack will fight for working people (except the rich, I guess). Barack loves his kids, there's a shocker. He's still the same man she fell in love with. Vote Barack.

8:57: Barack makes an appearance on satellite. "How about Michelle?" Claims he asked her out a bunch of times, that qualifies him to be President, since he's "persistent". Ignores his kid when she says "hi, daddy". Tells the fam to sleep tight. The convention ends after the Benediction. And with that, I've wasted 3 hours.

A Joke

So there's this atheist, right? Now, he's no ordainary atheist. This guy's the head of the Colorado Freethinkers. So he's smart, right? So anyway, this guy submits an editorial. He says that the newspaper's previous editorial on atheists (saying they can be arrogant, condescending, and narrow-minded) is wrong, that they aren't like that. But here's the punchhline- or, rather, multiple punchlines-

He says atheists comprise more than 10% of the United States! What an idiot, they're actually 4-5%!

He says that George Soros is the best, most generous person ever! What an idiot, he's corrupt, unlike our real leading philanthropists, Bill and Melinda Gates!

He says the faithful shouldn't call them arrogant. Then he insults Christians, Muslims and the like by proudly declaring how atheists "don't start needless wars, don't waste their time, value their lives, etc." and condescends to them, plain and clear. Hah! What an idiot!

He says, "Praying hasn't helped the Republican Party resist fraud, torture, pandering, cheating on their wives or lying to the country. This shows the futility of prayer itself." Besides this being one of the most moronic things I've ever heard, it's funny! What an idiot! The Democratic party, your party, hasn't overcome that resistance itself!

Har hardy har har, wasn't that great? I can see why my conservative newspaper put it in there. I smell pens writing furiously to the editor in response to it.

Just another reason for me to not spend my time at the Freethinkers of Colorado on Friday nights.